One of the keys to success and happiness in life is your attitude. I’ve seen a lot of people overachieve and overcome more adversity than they should because of a positive attitude, and I’ve seen a lot of people never live up to their full potential because of a bad or negative one.
Your attitude is how you think or feel about someone or something and it is reflected in your behavior - how you act, how you treat others, and the energy you bring and give.
One of the signs of maturity and growth is learning how to control what you can control and let go of what you can’t, and your attitude is always under your control no matter what is happening to you or going on around you.
In his book, What Drives Winning, Brett Ledbetter says your character drives the process and the process drives results. Results are what we get, the process is the work we do to get what we want, and our character is how we do what we do. Our attitude drives our character and the process. When life is great and everything is going your way, a humble but hungry attitude will keep you going in the right direction, and a satisfied, ego-driven attitude could send you crashing to The Pit l. When you are stuck in The Pit, your attitude either keeps you there or is the reason you climb out of it.
Is your attitude positive or negative, and is it helping you or hurting you?
We all think of examples of when bad attitudes have ruined people and teams, but hall-of-fame basketball coach Jay Wright has a story about how one athlete, Frank Tweezy, earned a scholarship and leadership role based on his attitude alone. Coach Wright led Villanova to 2 National Championships and 4 Final Fours. He tells his athletes attitude is the most important characteristic they can have a positive attitude. He says, “We want our guys to understand that the greatest characteristic you can have is a great attitude. It’s a choice you have - every day - when you get up. There are things you can’t control. Some days, you are going to make your shots. Some days, the refs are going to make bad calls. What you can control is your attitude and how you approach what you are doing that day.”
Here is how they measure attitude: “Where is your mindset after something bad happens to you?”
Coach Wright said they weren’t going to recruit Tweezy because they didn’t think he was good enough to play at their level, but they gave him a scholarship because of his attitude and how he would fit in the locker room. When they won a big game allowing them to play in the Final Four, Tweezy was the person they selected to cut the final piece of the net and hold it up, an honor usually reserved for the team’s best player or coach.
How did Frank Tweezy go from not being recruited to a leader on a Final Four team? Attitude!
But what do you do when bad things happen to you and around you? How can you maintain a positive attitude while you are in The Pit?
Having an anchor statement that you can lean on when times get tough can help redirect your attitude when needed. An anchor statement is a word or phrase that represents who you are or who you want to be. When I face adversity, one of the anchor statements I use is, “Bitter or better.” I know that every situation I face can make me bitter or better depending on how I choose to look at it. When I start feeling bitter, I say to myself, “Bitter or better,” and it helps me redirect myself, my energy, and my attitude.
Retired Navy seal Jocko Willink uses the word Good as his anchor statement when dealing with setbacks, failures, and disappointments. When people pull him aside to talk about issues or major problems, his response is always, ‘Good,’ because no matter how bad something is going, something good can come from it and there is always something you can learn from every situation. Did you lose a drill, scrimmage, or game? Good; you put yourself out there, and now you know what you need to get better at. Got hurt? Good; your mind and body could use a break. Struggling in practice? Good; growth happens outside of your comfort zone. Don’t get the job? Good; more time to get better and gain more experience.
Your attitude determines how you show up and how you respond to what happens to you. Every morning, wake up with a purpose, set your attitude in the morning, and adjust it throughout the day. Think about what kind of attitude you want to have when things are going good, and what kind of attitude you want to have when things aren’t going so great. Then, monitor your attitude throughout the day and make adjustments as needed.
Most of us let our emotions and feelings control our attitudes and actions, but the best of the best know that their attitude and emotions can dictate how they feel. Decide today what kind of attitude you want to have. Every day when you wake up, say to yourself, “Something good is going to happen to me and through me,” and put on the attitude you want. Doing gratitude walks, saying positive affirmations, listening to something positive, and writing in your journal can help you set your attitude.
Confucius once said, “The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones." Set and change your attitude one thought, one action, one morning, and one day at a time. Boxing champion Muhammad Ali once said, “It isn't the mountains ahead to climb that wear you out; it's the pebble in your shoe.” Don’t let a bad attitude be the pebble in your shoe.
SOMETHING(s) TO THINK ABOUT
1 - What do you want your attitude to be? What do you want people around you to say about your attitude?
2 - What can a good morning routine be to help you set your attitude?
3 - When you face adversity, what can you do or say to reset your attitude?
4 - How can you help the people around you have a more positive attitude?
For a printable PDF version of this, click here: The Power of Attitude
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