Motivational speaker Jim Rohn once said that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with.
Research shows that our relationships are the greatest indicator of success, well-being, and happiness.
The strengths of our relationship are a greater success indicator than wealth and fame. People who are deeply connected to someone or a group or community but have unhealthy habits (like smoking and alcohol) consistently outlive people who have extremely healthy habits but are not relationally connected to any group.
The quality of your life will always be a direct reflection of the quality of your relationships.
We are all born with the need for relationships and strong social connections. Great relationships help us feel happier, more hopeful, and healthier.
Who are you connected to? I heard a preacher once say that Jesus's life and relationships are a great example of the relationships we should seek.
Everywhere Jesus went, large crowds followed. By the end of Jesus's life, there were about 120 people who walked around with him. This is called His Outer Circle of Care. These are the people he cared for, blessed, fed, served, and healed. Many of these people were unbelieving people that Jesus was trying to bring into the Kingdom of God.
You will probably have between 100-120 people in your life that you know and that you care about. You hope that good things happen to them.
But Jesus had 12 disciples with whom he worked closely. These 12 apostles were in Jesus's Circle of Influence. They followed Him and wanted to have their lives conformed to the image of Christ. These are the people who were greatly helped by Jesus and who helped Jesus.
Here's a list of the 12 disciples and their traditional roles:
Peter (Simon Peter): Often considered the leader of the apostles, he was known for his strong faith and impulsive nature.
Andrew: The brother of Peter, he was the first apostle to be called by Jesus.
James the Greater: The son of Zebedee and brother of John, he was known for his fiery temper.
John the Evangelist: The youngest of the apostles, he is known for his writings in the New Testament, including the Gospel of John, the three Epistles of John, and the Book of Revelation.
Philip: One of the first apostles to follow Jesus, he is known for his role in introducing Philip the evangelist to Jesus.
Bartholomew: Also known as Nathanael, he was skeptical at first but became a faithful follower after meeting Jesus.
Thomas: Known as "Doubting Thomas" for his initial skepticism about Jesus' resurrection, he later became a strong believer.
Matthew: A tax collector who was called by Jesus to follow Him. He is believed to have written the Gospel of Matthew.
James the Less: The son of Alphaeus and brother of Jude, he was also known as "James the Just."
Thaddaeus: Also known as Jude the Apostle, he is believed to have written the Epistle of Jude.
Simon the Zealot: A member of a Jewish sect known as the Zealots, he was known for his commitment to Jewish law and tradition.
Judas Iscariot: The apostle who betrayed Jesus for 30 pieces of silver, leading to His arrest and crucifixion.
The purpose of the 12 disciples was to follow Jesus, learn from Him, and spread His message throughout the world. They were entrusted with the task of establishing the early Christian church and proclaiming the good news of Jesus' life, death, and resurrection.
Among Jesus's 12 disciples, there were only 3 that were in His Inner Circle of Intimacy. Peter, James, and John went with Jesus wherever He went. They were with Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane and saw Jesus pray so hard that He sweat blood. They saw all of Jesus, all of His heart, and everything about Him. Nothing was hidden from them.
In your life, there are 3 to 5 people that you will let in this closely. There are 3 to 5 people that you let in your life at the deepest levels, and these 3 to 5 people will directly affect who you are, what you do, and the life you live.
We all have something in life that we want to become. The people in our Inner Circle of Intimacy will affect the trajectory of our lives more than anything else, so make sure that those 3 to 5 people share your values and will hold you accountable to your values.
Proverbs 13:20 says, “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.”
Whoever walks with successful people will become successful.
Whoever walks with people who make excuses and lives with a victim mentality becomes someone who makes excuses and lives with a victim mentality.
Whoever walks with people who have a winner's mentality and find a way to win becomes someone who has a winner's mentality and finds a way to win.
Whoever walks with winners becomes a winner.
The number one way to change your life is to decide to change the people you spend the most time with.
You are one great relationship and community away from changing your life forever. Change your community, and you can change your life.
SOMETHING(s) TO THINK ABOUT
1 - What is your biggest takeaway from this post?2 - Who is in your inner circle, and how do they add value to your life?
3 - Who is someone in your inner circle with whom you would like to spend more time with?
4 - Who is someone in your inner circle with whom you might need to limit your time with?
My Prayer
Dear, God. Thank you for giving us the example of the 12 disciples. I pray that I have good people in my life who add value and make me a better person. I pray for discernment in choosing who I allow in my inner circle. Thank you for everything you have given me. In Jesus’s name, I pray. Amen.
For a printable PDF version of this post, click here: The 12 Disciples and Your Inner Circle
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